What's a Happy Childhood All About?

It is said that the happiest time is childhood. Well, definitely not for everyone. And it’s not about toys, money, or anything else.

Childhood is a period when your life is completely dependent on others (parents, for example). The human child is the most vulnerable because it does not feed itself and does not adapt to the cold, as animals do. It is completely dependent on her parents or other figures who will take care of her.

And you, as a child, have to learn all the rules of the family, adapt to them, even if they do not like them, become comfortable (do what is necessary and as needed for parents, otherwise you will be accused, at best). And you have to follow these rules, guidelines, and instructions to survive.

And we have to learn to do many things:

to finish food if you do not want to because the plate should always be empty, (and in general to sit down to eat, although there is no hunger);

to share your toys with other children, even though they are so important and you don’t want to give them away, and why you need to part with them at all;

hide your anger, because you can’t shout at your mother (and if you shout, they can still hit you);

be comfortable, do not ask for anything and do not want, because my parents do not have the money, time and energy for me;

or, conversely, to do everything possible so that my parents would somehow pay attention to me;

be like the girl/boy next door because mom said he/she is better than me.

Happy childhood: what it is

A happy childhood is not a time when you have a lot of toys, sandbox friends, and kindergarten. A happy childhood is when you are allowed to be yourself, to develop, to create, to feel important and valuable, to learn to make decisions and to be responsible for them. It is good when they allow showing all the emotions, including, for example, crying out loud to a boy, because everyone can cry (and who even thought that boys can not cry), get angry at mom or dad, and express this anger, not collect all in itself.

What, exactly, is a child’s happiness?

What factors influence their formation? Moral? Physical? Cultural? Social? Probably everyone without exception. What should be done to make a child happy? And a lot should be done. It is difficult to imagine how a child feels without parents or other family members. And when a child is systematically punished? And if they do not respect her interests, do not take care of her, do not protect her? What result can be expected? Can you imagine a stateless child? Such a child – no one. There are cases when a child is illegally moved and not returned from abroad. Sexual exploitation, participation in armed conflicts, parental abuse, child trafficking. And this, in the end, leads to the fact that children who have suffered at least some violence will grow up to be cruel adults. So what is it, a happy childhood? Probably in the richest country? Or, perhaps, not in the very rich, but is one where the state puts children’s needs first?

According to official WHO statistics, 20% of children in the world have mental disorders. One of the most important periods of the child’s formation and development is the first year of life, which is key in the formation of spiritual and emotional contact between the child and his parents. It has been proven that parents should always, especially in the first months of a baby’s life, pay maximum attention to him, and give him love and affection. Children who have been deprived of maternal warmth and love in the first year of their lives will in the future show distrust of the world around them because during this period the child is laying the foundations of trust.

It’s good when you know that you are still loved, even if you made a mistake or did not do something. They love you and value you simply for what you are, not because you need to do something and deserve that love. That’s what a happy childhood is for me. And those who did not have such a childhood, have to learn everything as an adult.

Being an adult is the happiest time. After all, your life does not depend on someone but belongs only to you. And what happiness it is to create your destiny and make your life the way you want. Or, for example, to take and regain the same lost happy childhood.

Anastasia Fetter

Anastasia Fetter